Sunday, October 17, 2004

Felice Orwell

"Oh, God, let's quit fooling around," Dogger Gatsby panted.

"Hmm?" she murmured.

"Let's get naked and make love."

"Mmm! I'm in favor of that!" Felice Orwell said in a throaty voice. She grinned shyly and shook her clean dirty-blonde hair. "Let's do it!"

Dogger Gatsby grinned at her helplessly for the hundredth time that night. He felt like he had grin-itis. He loved to hear her talk. He'd never liked a West-Texas accent very much, but that accent of hers was so pleasing, it almost sounded musical to him. They'd been wrestling slowly, tenderly with one another for ten minutes or so now. It was the first time they'd ever really touched one another, and they were having a great time, although they were getting very agitated. They were sprawled across her unmade bed, so they were in the right place for it. His feet were still on the floor, which made him feel a little like some censorship-bound screen-lover from a forties movie. The rest of his body, however, was half on top of the slim girl, and he had one hand under and all the way up her skirt. Which was a little more representative of a young man of the early seventies trying to get in his girlfriend's pants.

"Mmm," she sighed again as they hurriedly undressed one another. "Don't stop kissing!"

Dogger kissed her, happy to be of service. He loved that soft sound of gratification she made in her throaty West-Texas voice. He had always disliked strong accents, but hers had utterly charmed him-was, as you will see, about to charm the pants off of him. Everything was happening quickly, everything was going well. He couldn't have been happier or more surprised.

Felice Orwell had been his neighbor for two or three months now, living in the apartment above him with her sister, Melody, who was one year younger. The sisters were both students at the nearby University of Texas. It was the Christmas season, and he'd been very busy with business, so that he'd barely spoken to either of the sisters, except in passing. Until tonight, of course. He came home late that Saturday afternoon from selling on the Drag, excited about how well sales had gone. He'd been selling leather goods in the crafts market across the street from the UT main campus for years now, and Christmas-time was the only time of year he made really good money. He'd made eight hundred bucks that day and could hardly believe it. He felt rich and very much in need of a celebration. After bathing and changing into some new clothes he'd bought on the way home, he'd felt refreshed, definitely ready for something. He just didn't know what.

"I need to spend some of this money!" he thought. He sat by the phone and speculated about whom he might call. "You got to share," he thought glibly. He was in a better mood than he'd been in ages.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door; it was Felice, the tall slim blonde from upstairs, and she was dressed to the teeth. He couldn't remember ever seeing her in anything but corduroy pants and old shirts, and he was certain he'd never seen her hair fixed like this. She must have been conscious of it, too, as she was grinning awkwardly and looking a little jittery. Dogger thought she looked handsome and flushed and wonderfully alive. He almost wanted to lick his lips.

"Hey, boy!" Felice said, a little too loudly.

"Hey, girl," he answered her softly, smiling at her nervous exuberance.

"Ha! I do sound idiotic, don't I?" she said disarmingly. "Uh, hey, look, I was just wonderin' if you had plans tonight? I don't have any plans myself, but I sure want to do somethin'! I've been studyin' my butt off all week for these finals and I'm just about to bust!"

Dogger laughed softly. Her directness was charming, but it was more than that. He'd thought about her several times these past few weeks. It was odd how much he liked listening to her voice. He couldn't remember when he'd been more pleased to see anyone.

"Uh, I'm not butting in on you, am I?" she asked. "Are you getting ready to go somewhere or something?"

She had spoken more softly, he noticed. Also she was suddenly pronouncing all the letters at the ends of her words. He wondered if that meant she was getting less nervous or more. More, perhaps, for she began to glance repeatedly at the empty hallway behind her as if afraid she was blocking someone's path.

"No, absolutely not," he smiled. "Come in." Felice took a single step across his threshold, still grinning, still looking flustered and flushed.

"Well, you wanna go out with me?" Felice said. She'd blurted it out hastily, apparently still trying to be dead honest, to spell out her intentions. Dogger smiled. He didn't understand how they'd come about, but he'd already figured out her intentions and was pleased with them.

"Sure, I do," Dogger said. "This is great. It's exactly what I was trying to figure out. I had a great day on the Drag and I absolutely need to celebrate."

"Oh, that's good," she smiled. She began to look a little less likely to turn and run back upstairs. "Yeah, I see now; you're kinda all dressed up too, huh?"

"All dressed up with no place to go!" he declared with a self-conscious grin.

"I've heard that phrase somewhere before," she beamed at him, glancing down self-consciously at her shiny dress."

"That's very pretty," he told her. "It looks good on you. Is it new?"

"Oh, thank you!" she said, clearly relishing the compliment. "It's not new, though."

"Still pretty," he said. "What color is that? Some kind of pink?"

"Pale rose," she said, glancing briefly at her reflection in the mirror above his artificial fireplace. Felice took a few small, almost prancing steps into the room and let him shut the door behind her. They looked at each other appreciatively and smiled.

That was how it'd begun, just a few hours ago. He'd never expected to be so intrigued with her. He'd certainly never expected her to share the intrigue. But that was how all his new affairs began; it never failed to surprise him when a woman liked him. They started by going to Castle Creek, a small nightclub in downtown Austin. A large woman folk-singer with a strong husky voice and straight brown hair that hung to her waist was playing that weekend. They agreed she looked a little like Cass Elliot, except that she wasn't nearly as big.

"She's still a pretty full-figured woman, though, isn't she?" Dogger teased Felice, leaning close to her in the dim light and half-shouting to be heard over the amplified music.

"Sure is," Felice hollered back. He barely heard her and looked at her questioningly. "She's one of those women that makes me feel like a refugee from a concentration camp!" she half-shouted. Just then the music ended and Felice looked chagrinned, wondering if everyone in the room had heard her.

"You're just deliciously slim and paranoid, like a lot of women," he told her. "On the other hand, she'd probably worry you make her look like a cow," Dogger laughed.

"She's fat and paranoid, huh?" Felice grinned.


"You sound like you know all there is to know about fat women and skinny women," Felice pretended to pout.

"No, not exactly. There's no explaining the opposite poles of women's vanity, though, I know that."

"Lucky for you men that you aren't bothered with such things, huh?" Felice laughed.

Dogger looked slightly abashed and patted his large stomach and shrugged. "Yeah, we're lucky that way."

"A man of wonderful intelligence!" Felice kidded him.

Dogger sipped his drink nervously. Maybe it was just the alcohol, but he began to worry if she understood that he was just kidding.

"In the meanwhile, buddy," she added, putting her hand firmly on his leg, "you gonna get me drunk or what?" He sighed with relief.

They spent a lot of money on drinks that night. Still, it didn't seem to be the liquor that made them drunk. They left Castle Creek and drove around the hills on the outskirts of Austin for an hour or more, talking and laughing and looking at things together. The longer they looked around, the better things looked. About midnight, he took her home. Since she lived upstairs from him, it felt very strange. He was "home" too. Parking his car in back, as usual, he took her arm and they walked slowly toward two doors at the back of the building. The door to his kitchen was to their right, the door that led up the back stairs to her apartment was to their left. They stopped to kiss between the doors, then hesitated.

"Well, maybe I ought to go on to bed," she yawned, stroking his nose lightly with her finger.

"Oh!" he whispered. He looked confused. Felice giggled at his expression and kissed him briefly on the lips. He pulled her back toward him and kissed her twice more. "Nice kiss," he sighed.

"I think so, too," she laughed softly. Without another word, she turned toward the door on her left and was gone. Dogger unlocked his door and stepped into his kitchen, still hearing her feet tripping lightly up the stairs overhead. He winced as he flipped the wall switch and was blinded by the overhead light.

"What just happened?" he asked himself irritably. "What am I doing here? What, what?!"

He was in love and in lust, totally aroused and wide awake. And totally confused.
Ten minutes later he was tapping at her back door. She'd removed her dress and was wearing a bright blue dressing gown over her long white slip.

"You forget somethin'?" she grinned.

"I feel like I did," he said, feeling foolish.

What if she thought he was a jerk? Maybe she'd really wanted him to leave her alone. Maybe she'd had her fun, her drinks, her little kiss, and that was the end of it? Maybe he hadn't been nearly as charming as he'd thought or as she'd hoped. Damn, why was it always so hard for him to tell what women wanted?! Although he didn't particularly feel drunk any more, he leaned tipsily against the door frame as if he was, beamed at her, and sighed.

"You wanna come in?" she asked him.

"You wanna let me?"

"I asked you first," she laughed.

"I want to come in," he said.

"Yeah, well, I want you to," she said. "So how come you're just standing there?"

"Inertia, I guess," he said. "Or else so happy, I just can't move."

"Unlikely story," she said, shaking her head and reaching for his hand.

Her long slim fingers felt cool as they caressed, then intertwined and locked with his fingers. She pulled him inside. He began to feel vaguely like a dancer from one of those romantic old movies, for, without taking her eyes off of him, she had given the door a shove with her free hand, simultaneously swinging him away from her in a wide arc, then bringing him back toward her as she herself turned. He sucked in his breath, feeling light on his feet for once, moving toward her in a slow smooth curve, at the end of which he found himself in her embrace, his lips pressed firmly, thrillingly, against hers.

"You're a smooth operator, aren't you?" he sighed a few moments later.

"No, I'm not!" She looked embarrassed for a moment, then shrugged and grinned.

"Very smooth," he said, kissing her on the cheek.

"Well, it's nice of you to say so, but I'm sure I don't know what you mean!" she chuckled. "I suppose you hadn't thought about this, either, huh?" she added.

"Not in detail," he sighed. "Just repeatedly." He grinned as she nuzzled her forehead against his chest and wrapped both arms around his waist.

"Mmm, you're big," she said softly.

"You're thin," he answered as he lovingly carressed her back and sides.

"Yeah," she purred. She took his hand and led him quickly to her bedroom.

"Watch out for the doggie papers," she said. "I've got a new puppy."

"Oh, okay," he said, skirting the dirtied newspapers. "Where is the dog?"

"Sleeping like a log in the living room," Felice said. Without looking back, she gave her bedroom door a hard push and it swung closed. She sat down on the edge of the bed and Dogger sat down beside her. She looked slightly embarrassed as she nuzzled her cheek against his, then pushed her hand between the buttons of his shirt and slyly began to caress his chest.

"Falling in love's such fun, isn't it?" he whispered, lifting her face and kissing the side of her nose.

"It makes life New again," Felice murmured. "Like music you haven't heard in ages," she sighed, beginning to nod her head rhythmically.

She closed her eyes. She wanted more of those kisses. She made a noise—a deep-throated "mmm" that he began to think of with some amusement as her "signature" sound. Then she leaned back sensuously on the bed. Dogger shifted slightly to accommodate her as she lifted her legs onto the bed, then leaned down and fervently kissed her, pressing his upper torso firmly against hers. Thus they'd reached the point mentioned earlier where he'd decided to try to get in her pants and she'd decided to let him.

"Don't stop kissing!" she gasped as they began to remove one another's clothing.

Dogger was eager to please. Nonetheless he was having an awkward time of it as they tried to kiss and undress each other at the same time. At last, they were nude and he tumbled into bed beside her. Before long they were both panting.

"Oh, Gawd!" Felice shivered.

"What is it?"

"Let's do it, dammit!" Felice giggled.

"Don't be so anxious," he told her.

Starting at his neck, she moved her hand downward, dragging her fingers across his chest until it went over the edge of his belly and disappeared from sight. "Oh! Mmm... I see you're not far behind me!"

"You better hope not, anyway!" he smirked. "'Cause I'm certainly ready to try it!"

"You sure?" she asked, holding his face gently between her small hands. "We don't really have to hurry. I was just...teasing know?"

"Honey, don't worry; I've never been more ready! I'm thrilled, I'm engorged, I'm very nearly salivating and masticating!"

"Oh, good! In that case, I wasn't teasing at all!" she declared with a grin that seemed to stretch from ear to ear. She rolled over, settling herself flat on her back, and reached up for him.

"Boy, you're pushy. You sure you don't wanna get on top?" he teased her, holding back from her.

"Good grief!" she giggled. "We'll do it that way later! Just get on me!"

Just as he settled down on top of her, he heard a scampering and scuffling on the floor.

"Oh, fuckin' hell!" Felice sighed. "The puppy woke up, and I left the door open!"

"I could get up and close it," Dogger said.

"You won't, though!" she chortled, wrapping her arms and legs around him tightly. "You stay right where you are!"

"Mmm," he sighed. He wiggled himself around very carefully on top of her, making no forward movements whatsoever yet. The puppy continued to scamper around the room, intermittently sniffing at the edge of the bed. It wasn't quite tall enough to reach them or even to see over the edge of the bed.

"Mmm, that's good, Dogger," she sighed.

"I thought so, too," he said. He had his hands flat beside her, supporting most of his weight with his arms. Then he leaned down and licked her ears as he slowly began to move himself inside of her. As his body slid slightly downward, his toes stuck off of the bed and he felt something lick them.

"Felice, your dog is licking my toes," he said tensely.

"Ignore it!" she gasped. "Keep doing what you're doing!"

The dog jumped up on the bed and sniffed noisily at Dogger's bottom.

"If that mutt licks my butt while I'm doing this," he muttered in her ear, "I'll..."

"You'll what?!" she said, huffing and puffing, beginning to move herself passionately against him, hoping she could ignore the whole thing.

"At the very least, I'll get the hysterical giggles," he said, snickering slightly even as he said it. "Or I might get so aroused that I bang you to smithereens. Accidentally screw you to death, you know?"

Felice opened her eyes wide and smirked uncertainly. Her cheeks filled with air, then her lips vibrated as she expelled a blast of air, creating a clamorous noise that subsided into a hysterical fit of laughter. Her body quaking violently beneath him, he gasped as she pulled him against her, squeezing him so hard that he could barely breathe. Dogger had a sudden vision of suffocating on top of her in his aroused state; losing control, he began to laugh helplessly too.

"Oh, G-G-Gawd!" she gasped loudly, trying to talk through her laughter and to be heard over his. "I want you to make love to me so bad right now and y-y-you're just making me laugh! Don't do that! You will kill me!"

Dogger's breath was coming in gasps as she loosened her hold on him and he began trying to catch his breath, stifle his own laughter, and regain his sense of direction all at once. He was still very aroused. Beneath him, Felice had stopped laughing and he looked at her face. She didn't look like she'd giggled herself out of the mood yet, either.

"Just keep doing what you're doing!" she panted sharply. "The dog won't bother us. You can't kill me; this feels too good!"

"You sure?" he grinned.

"I won't die, I promise!" she snickered, losing control of herself all over again. He watched her with a bemused look as she began to furiously slap the sheets with the flats of her hands, tears pouring down her cheeks.

"I thought it was only dogs that got locked into positions like this," Dogger said drolly.

"Oh, Gawd-in-heaven, shut up!" she shrieked.

His remark didn't help Felice at all. It was just too comical. She beat the sheets even harder. The puppy ran forward to investigate her noises, made the supreme effort to jump up onto the bed, and then licked repeatedly at their faces. Felice thought the dog's activity the most hilarious thing yet and gave a bronx cheer right in the puppy's face. The little dog blinked his eyes and sneezed once, then licked his face repeatedly.

"Do you feel as much like a pervert as I do?" he asked her.

"I think I do now!" Felice cackled, giving the dog a gentle but firm push, brushing it off the bed. "Stay down, you little twerp!" she said. "Stay down!"

"You're not speaking to me, are you?" he asked her, trying to keep a straight face. "There's quite enough danger of that as it is!"

Felice threw her head back and roared. Dogger thought she was pretty funny herself, the uninhibited way she laughed. And pretty, too. It wasn't every woman, he felt, who could look so appealing under such circumstances. Felice looked as good to Dogger when she looked ridiculous as she did when she didn't, and his desire for her, like his erection, hadn't flagged one iota.

"Jesus, if I laugh any more, I'll die, I swear I'll die!" she sighed. She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed tightly, suffocating him again.

"F-f-falling in love is fun, is-is-isn't it?" he stuttered, unable to hold back his laughter.

"This fucking's not so bad, either!" she howled tearfully.

They held onto each other tightly and kept quiet for a long while after that. Why the dog didn't come back, they never knew, but eventually Felice spoke up in that straightforward West Texas voice of hers.

"Listen, Dogger, we gotta get serious, don't you think? We got to screw."

"I'm ready," he told her, though he couldn't for the life of him have explained how. She began to kiss him again, this time wearing a very serious expression and mostly keeping her eyes closed. They finished making love without further interruption and Felice didn't die. Or, if she did, she lived to enjoy it. So did Dogger. Before they made love again, however, he searched the room carefully, closed the door and shoved a chair against the doorknob.


4th draft: 02/10/07
©1990 Ronald C. Southern